Saturday 24 November 2012

Element of trust

There was a very nice play that we all saw times and times again for an Arab actor called Adil Imam.  The play was called Shahid Ma Shafsh Haga, which means "the witness who saw nothing".  The play was repeatedly shown on TV in the 80's, and people used to mention quotes from it on a daily basis which proves to what extent  people got influenced by the play.  In a nutshell the main actor had supposedly seen a murder of his neighbor and he was called to court to testify, but he had no idea why was he called. Due to his innocence and trust he used to think that everybody on earth was great and no one would harm anyone, as there is no reason to harm anyone!

At the end of the court session the judge told him that he has to change? And he did, he became a normal human being who would do the stuff that normal people do, which are basically the stuff we are morally prevented from doing; so he would lie, drink, spend his money on girls and on stuff that are not necessarily classified under "good" but are in fact harmful.  Basically he went from one end of the spectrum to the other end.  One sentence by a judge changed a person's life drastically.  The judge told him that things has to be either white or black, no shades in between, the judge didn't like the colour grey, so it has to be removed from people's lives and from the dictionary.

We the naive always give the benefit of the doubt, we ignore the blind spots, do things according to our thinking and always trust everyone unconditionally! I am 56 soon to be 57! And I feel I should do what the main actor in "the witness who saw nothing" did, It will either be black or white. I will not have any shades in between, I will forget the colours of the rainbow, and ignore the songs of nature, I will put a little doubt in every person I deal with, I will tie my discussions with contracts and conclude every meeting with a letter from a lawyer!

We also need to do this with our family, friends, relatives, students, teachers, schools, universities and whoever we come in contact with.  There is no meeting without an ulterior motive, so even if we meet someone there was business to be gained by everybody, so a knot had to be tied.  Even between lovers, a knot had to be tied, between employees, a knot had to be tied, between companies, a knot had to be tied! Element of trust???? I guess not, don't trust anyone and don't be naive, question everything, and don't even talk unless you have a contract protecting you at the outset.

The past ten years had taught me so many things, but due to my naivety I used to think that I was wrong, that I should not think the worst in people, I should not expect a benefit from everything I do.  But when everyone gets a benefit and I get nothing then there must be something wrong? Of course I should not blame people for being dishonest, I should blame myself for being so trusting??

My friend had trusted her husband unconditionally for the past 30 years, then she found out that he goes out with other women! She leaves the house and flushes her good and bad memories down the toilette and starts a new life.  Another guy finds out that his company used to underpay him after a long and agonizing service period he leaves the company and starts a fresh. A student gets kicked out of school because she was helping other students to pass, so the good doer gets kicked out and the bad ones stay put.  If you remember the movie about the creator of facebook and how they take him to court, again an element of trust that shouldn't have been given.  I am not going to list or narrate for you what stuff people do to get what they want, I am sure that you know how people cheat, lie, pretend, etc, as this is the human beings bad nature which is used to satisfy self-interest and vanity.

You see a lot of these incidents and more in this life, and of course only in us the mortals. That is why there is a huge industry of protectors, and even the Quraan warned us from doing anything unless we have a witness. 

So from today, I will do what Adil Imam did in "the witness who saw nothing".  Shall I sue the university or the universities? Shall I sue the bank or banks? shall I sue those that robbed me from my ideas? shall I jeopardise the work of other companies that were based on what I mentioned to them and at the time they had rejected my proposals?

I am not also going to write what I had learnt in the past ten years, as I know that I truly didn't learn; I will repeat what I did and will continue to give unconditionally as its my nature. Can one teach an old dog new tricks? can one rewind the clock backward and regain time? I don't think so.  

However I am writing this to you all, so you can learn, especially the young ones.  Don't trust anyone, keep your mouth shut and don't be a smart Alec.  Take it from me! You only have yourself to blame. 

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